Monday Musings 9/16

I think every job interview should include the Replicant Screening process from Bladerunner. Not to test in case you might be a Replicant, but more so to see if you’ve watched the movie. Also, it would determine whether you know the difference between a turtle and tortoise. These are important distinctions to know.

  1. The cold air of fall seems to be working its nostalgic magic on me. All I can think about is the leaves burning bright, football season starting, and the upcoming holidays. I’m lucky enough to do a family tradition with my father’s side of the family where we all meet to watch the first Vikings game. We’ve been doing it for almost 20 years. That’s insane. The amount of change that has happened within this time period is astronomical. Yet, when this season starts the sensations seem so natural, it is like nothing has changed. I’m getting a little too existential. I usually save that quandary for number four.
  2. Alright, I’m officially excited for a movie for the same reason I’m motivated to write endlessly about monsters. The Lighthouse with Dafoe and Pattinson is coming out soon, and I’ve watched the first trailer close to a dozen times. I love the setting of the lighthouse, having wanted to base my fiction in that environment many times. What I’m hoping for is that beyond it being a psychological maelstrom is that there is some sort of monster involved, something Cthulhu-esque so to speak. Whether that’s a mermaid, squid person, or just a maritime phantom, I don’t care. I want a monster, plus all the other tensions.
  3. My evil capitalist rambling this week is my urging/asking/telling/begging/promoting people to purchase a new copy of my book Monsters, Monsters, Everywhere through my Square Store. If you’ve been reading this blog for a very long time and you’ve been like, “hey, I think I would like to try a book and don’t know if The Greenland Diaries is my thing, what should I read?” Well, the answer is Monsters, Monsters, Everywhere because it is a culmination of all my favorite/best short stories from various genres, from science fiction to fantasy. I guarantee you’ll find something you like, regardless of your tastes in fiction. Click HERE to get a copy.
  4. This week’s existential crisis (there is always more than one, a plethora to pick from) has to do with a video game. Final Fantasy VIII to be precise. It has been about 20 years since I’ve played it really, but now I have it for Nintendo Switch. I’m worried about playing it again because I’m afraid it’ll bring me back to a host of memories from high school where I was playing through all the classic Squaresoft releases with my friend Matt. I’m not concerned about the exact recollections, because most of them are happy. I’m more worried it’ll make me miss my friend, Matt. Our friendship quasi-ended when he graduated from high school. He was a few years older than me and he went to college locally, but I didn’t do a very good job of keeping in contact with him. He actually was an intern at the NSA when school was happening, so I’m sure he’s a full-fledged spy now. I’ve looked for him on social media, but had no luck. Memory can lead you in so many different directions, including regret.
  5. This week in Craft Corner, I wanted to talk about two things I would have done differently with my self-publication projects. Number one would be to invest in a proofreader/editor/beta reader. This is paramount. You must do this. Also, have it be someone who isn’t particularly fond of you. No immediate family or friends. They’ll be honest, which is the most important thing. Hire someone if need be. Also, invest in a cover artist or graphic designer. If you can get a friend or family member to help, so be it, but a paid professional is your best option. Pay them. Having content you can be confident in, but also looks nice, well, it makes face-to-face sales so much easier. Learn from me young padawan.


  • I’m addicted to the blood orange flavor of San Pellegrino. Wow, my word program even knew that word. Guess even robots like it.
  • I’m binging Baki again. I like my blood sport stuff. I can’t help it. It is a part of my identity.
  • Vikings were 1-0 when I wrote this. Best record ever. Lol.
  • Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doom, I’m getting mentally ready for Link’s Awakening on Switch. The original vexed me. Ugh. So many hearts lost. I don’t want to use a strategy guide.
  • Trying to give up soda for the millionth time. It is EVERYWHERE.
  • I’m going to try and make some Teriyaki Beef this week. My wife isn’t a fan of that flavor, but I sincerely love it. It is almost a challenge to get her to like something she doesn’t. Challenge accepted.
  • I’m finally going to record my Perfect Monster podcast this week. We’ll probably do a bunch of the episodes and cut it all together. Our first beastie will be the Xenomorph from Alien. It makes me sad that Microsoft Office didn’t know that word, but it knows Pellegrino…
  • Have safe and healthy week everyone. Thank you for reading!

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